As a result of the fickle nature of public opinion, I would like to point out that all you used car salespeople out there should be properly thankful to the legal profession.
Why?
Because, thanks to attorneys, used car salespeople are no longer looked at as the traditional definition of a sleazy profession. Attorneys have now assumed that role and, if you believe only half of what you read, have given a whole new meaning to the term.
True story: Many years ago, A. Victor Thomas, chairman of Virginia’s House Conservation and Natural Resources Committee, decided that it was literally time to declare open hunting and trapping season on attorneys. He proposed an amendment that the state Game and Inland Fisheries Board develop regulations to permit the capture and disabling of attorneys through the use of hunter traps.
To make the hunting fair, his amendment prohibited using money as bait or shouting such attorney-catching words as “Whiplash!” or “Ambulance!”. Thomas also felt the regulations should take into account the great increase in lawyers throughout Virginia, as well as the role they play as a species: nuisance. This was actually reported as news in the Richmond Times-Dispatch.
Today, even oil company executives and Savings and Loan Presidents seem to get more respect than attorneys. (Question: what’s brown and white and looks good on an attorney? Answer: a pit bull).
Of course, to a great extent, they’re contributing to their image problem through the various television ads you now see run by attorneys in an attempt to drum up business. You’ve seen them – the ones featuring lawyers trying very hard to look concerned as they encourage the viewer to sue anyone who’s ever caused them any misfortune.
Back and neck injuries are of course always welcome and no need to worry about paying a fee. They’ll take it out of the large recovery they’ll obtain from the dirty so-and-so who did you harm.
No longer do lawyers have to endanger their own lives by following ambulances to the hospital looking for clients. Now, thanks to television, they can reach all potential accident victims at once.
All hospital rooms contain television sets, and there’s usually a phone located conveniently next to the bed with which to call the 800 number being flashed on the screen.
Sometimes it seems the commercials move almost seamlessly from Honest Joe’s Used Cars to your local law office, and to tell the truth, the car salesperson comes across as more likable. (Question: what’s the definition of utter waste? Answer: A busload of attorneys driving off a cliff with one empty seat.)
All this bad-mouthing of attorneys has a catch name: lawyer bashing. Some feel this is an admirably succinct and descriptive term. Curiously, you hear almost nothing in the way of defensive responses from the attorneys in answer to this ever-growing negative image they seem to be developing.
Ironically, the same people who successfully defend rapists and murderers have difficulty responding to the verbal and printed equivalent of being spit upon. (Question: why don’t attorneys ever get bitten by snakes? Answer: professional courtesy.)
I suppose in a way it’s sort of sad to see the deterioration of a previously honorable profession. From barrister to shyster, from attorney to snake, it’s been but a short leap.
No doubt it’s the business community that has been largely responsible for this, as they’ve born the brunt of being sued for everything from leaving out the prize in a Cracker Jack box (another true story)to having grown the grain that was used to distill the liquor that caused someone to get drunk and hurt someone else.
Is all this criticism justified? Having never sued anyone or been sued myself, I can’t honestly say. But I do know that the legal profession is being blamed today for everything from high insurance rates to the breakdown in the ozone layer.
If just ten percent of it is true, A. Victor Thomas should have been able to ride to the presidency on the coattails of his proposed hunting season on attorneys. (Question: why does New York have all the toxic waste dumps and California has all the lawyers? Answer: New York got to pick first.)
I do have one question that has been nagging me. Is being a used car salesperson a prerequisite to attending law school…or is it vice-versa?
Before you go…
You may think that non-attorney executives are much more appropriately focused, but you’d be wrong. Read my article about how to REALLY succeed in business if you want the inside story.
How To Succeed In Business